A global terrorist organisation coined by the met office as "weather" and known for its dreadful and indiscriminate use of natural biological weapons in October, November, December, January, February, March and sometimes in April, May, June, July, August and September has claimed responsibility for the horrible weather across the UK but no one has paid much attention.
"We're abit busy at the moment sorting out this Julian Assange fellow. Since we're hosting "freedom of speech day" we have to pin something else on him. Is it illegal to have sex without condoms?"
The mysterious phenomenon invading our atmosphere known as "snow" has being attributed to local councils and the government. Train networks, TFL and gritters are also being blamed for this winter-time phenomena.
Sun loving Brits claim that "weather" is now more of a threat than extremism and terror.
"It was so cold we had to flee to Majorca" said one couple from Milton Keynes.
"Weather" has so far eluded authorities but American Intelligence suggests he or she is hiding out in Pakistan.
"There was some big flood in one of those countries near Iraq recently.We know it definitely wasn't Afghanistan because we've still got some troops out there, so we've narrowed it down to Pakistan."
Meanwhile "weather" sent this message via video recording, "We attack every year at the same time, yet everyone is always shocked. So lets go through this again, summer is warm, autumn-the leaves fall, winter is bloody cold-ok!"
The "weather" video below was released to Al Jazeera some time in the last 48 hours and may cause some viewers distress. Middle east experts think the recording was inspired by the Paranormal Activity films.In fact, some suggest it stars the same dog. (not me).
Showing posts with label climate change. Show all posts
Showing posts with label climate change. Show all posts
Thursday, 9 December 2010
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